Dear God.... I NEED YOU NOW MORE THAN EVER! I pray for your guidance and your strength.... help me be strong...

"But the salvation of the righteous is of the Lord: he is their strength in the time of trouble. "
—Psalm 37:39

"My flesh and my heart faileth: but God is the strength of my heart, and my portion for ever."
—Psalm 73:26

"God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble."
—Psalm 46:1

Am I honestly ready to move on? Am I ready to start a new chapter in my life? Am I ready to forget about the past? You know what... With God by my side I'm ready for anything and everything that comes my way! I have nothing to worry about...

"For I know the plans for you...plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future"
-Jeremiah 29:11

I look forward for what God has planned for me. I'm tired of doing things my way and messing up Gods plan for me. Its time for me to shut up and listen.

Why have things changed? I feel like i dont even kno u. We dont see nor even speak to eachother anymore.

Its sad to say that its over...

I had one of the best days of my life on Saturday! I didnt think i would hav had so much fun. It was the Saturday when people from my church were going to get baptized. I thought we were going to the beach but as it turns out we went to someones house n used their swimming pool. I was so tired in the morning having as little as 2 hours sleep da nite before. Dat morning Nik-NakZz n i went to Dunkin Robins to get an Iced Mocha Latte to wake us up. It didnt work as much as i hoped. On our way to the house we stopped at Starbuks and got a Mochachinno or sumthing. By the time we got to the place Ate Lisa gave me he Iced Mocha Latte, so I had 3 in total cups of coffee and extra sugar. So basically you can see how hyped i was by the begining of da day.

Wen we got dere everyone just sat by the pool and waited for the baptism to start. My mom didnt allow me to be baptized so i respected her decision. The people who were gonna get baptised had a little service while Nik-NakZz n i just waited inside da house. Kuya Erick was showing us techniques to simplify our drumming. He showed us to use our wrist rather than out arms to drum. After the service everyone gathered by the pool tp watch and listen to the peoples testimonies. Their prayer was strong and hearfelt. As i watched people get baptized, when the pastor dunked the persons head underwater i saw my parents face rose from underwater. It was like i was watching my own parents get baptized. It was a tear-jerker and incredibly emotional.

After the baptism every one just ate n hung around. Kuya Eric showed us more drum moves while Aiko n Kuya Jet sang Kareoke. After than Aiko, Pastor Alex, Ate Ivy n her sister n i played volleyball. After i saw people riding Bikes so i asked dem if i can borrow it. [DONT LAUGH!] I asked if one of the can teach me how to ride a bike. [I kno i kno...ur laughing] Its not my fault i dono how to ride a bike...i never had the chance to...all ouf our bikes were stolen. No believed me wen i told them. They were amazed how someone my age doesnt kno how to ride a bike. Karen n Nelson were making fun of me! Hey... Just cuZz you kno how to ride a bike doesnt make u spacial! While everyone was making fun of me Nikka, Manejer n Kuya Eric helped me out, Mostly Kuya Eric tho. I couldnt get it... i was so frustrated! I tried n i tried... then i heard Aiko say "Lets go May...we gotta go to Jesus Rev!" I was not gonna leave this place until i kno how to ride this thing! So i focused n i eventually got it! I was so proud of myself! Just wanna say thanks to Nik-Naks n Kuya Eric for giving me patience.

Off we went to Jesus Revolution. It was just me, Nika, Aiko, Tony-Mack and Nilo. We had our fellowship on da way there and on da way back. Jesus Rev was intense. They showed videos of the youth in the philippines crying out and praising God. It was unbelievable. That was another emotional tym. All i could think and pray about was the salvation of my family and my friends. There is nothing more i want than that.

After the service everyone went downstairs to eat and fellowship. [yummy] PIZZA! After i ate i played fooseball. It was me and this little 7 yr old gurl against Geo, a guy my age and his parter, a 7 yr old boy. Ofcorse we won. On da second game it was me n Geo against the little people. [Cough] Ofcorse we let them win [Cough] After dat we fellowshiped some more on da way home. AikZz, Nika n i were filled with so much caffine dat nyt. I think Tony-Mack was getting annoyed so he drove fater on da way home to get rid of us quicker. We couldnt stop screamin, laughing and yelling...unlit that is... until Aiko played EJ's CD... Somehow it suked da caffene n sugar outta me...

Well... i kno it din seem dat exciting but there were many details that i din write about. Cant wait to get on a bike again... i still gotta learn howta turn...

Whew! Remember how i was so scared bout goin to St. Johns? Turns out i had nufin to fear. I met lots of new people... mostly hung out with Dolores, Cory, Marc, Micheal and Sonya. It was funny how at first wen i got there every one din kno any one so it was SoOo quiet... but by the end of the orientation every was upset they had to leave. Im pretty sure that i will hardly see the people i met (except for dolores) and everyone else knew that. I hope i get to see them around campus.

St. Johns is a WONDERFUL skool. I cant wait to go...cept i dun even kno if i can attend.... were having money problems. They hav a beautiful campus and its a pretty rich skool. To each person they gave out a disposable camera (ill post up da pix as soon as i develop them), a nice notebook thing, a t shirt, a whistle/flashlight/keychain, and a bag. The only thing dat wasnt dat good was da food... plus da place is so big that you would get lost.... I kno i will on da 1st day of skool...

The people.... I thought people from college would b different from da people from HS but as it turns out, deres not much of a difference. There are still sum people who act immature and try to get attention... that includes some of the leaders...

The events they planned for us wasnt THAT bad. Too much lectures tho...oh yeah...too much walking also. I liked the freshman party they had... i liked it so much i din go! [LolZz!] I hung out wif da ppl i met. Just sat and talked outside of da party then went back to the dorms got changed and hung out at the boys lounge and talked and watch sports center.

Hi GuyZz! Im so terrified about my sleepover orientaion @ St. John's on Wednesday. Talk about starting over. I dont kno anybody there. Im afraid that im gonna be sitting there in orientation in the corner all by myself... I scared having to meet new people.... Im shy n i dont normally talk to people untl they talk to me... I hope my roomate for that one night likes me...Only God can help me now...

My Ta-Ta: Wow... weve been having so many problems lately... Sorry bout dat. Ill do my best to do my part n start not to think negatively any more... I love you and im sorry for the fights weve been having. Forgive and Forget. I love you!